# 口と耳、愚痴をいう人
**Source:** https://taksanart.com/en/口と耳、愚痴をいう人
**Language:** English

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What I've felt as an artist is that I'm inherently introverted. However, I've had few opportunities in my life to be introverted. I didn't even realize it myself. But then there came a moment when I thought, "I'm so tired! I can't take it anymore!"

Since childhood, I've always had a role. Sometimes it was listening to complaints, other times it was taking care of my siblings, or leading the family. I somehow felt guilty expressing my own desires. Perhaps due to that training, interacting with people externally felt like an extension of 'that,' and I was good at it. However, conversely, the sense of peace and being my true self may have drifted further away. Things happened, and I don't do that anymore.

Oh right, today, well, putting that kind of talk aside for a moment, I realized something while interacting with various people. I thought I'd record it.

**"People Who Complain"**

Looking back now, there were quite a few people like that around me. When I hear about other people's problems, I want to help if I can. I listen attentively. Then, they'd say, 'Thanks for listening to my complaints!' and I'd foolishly think, 'I have value in living,' or 'What I've done is helping people, so it's rewarding.'

But I realized (※Of course, there are friends with whom I can have a reciprocal relationship, but this is about THAT kind of person!)   
  
These kinds of people aren't looking for 'solutions to their own problems.' And they absolutely don't listen to other people's stories. As long as they can vent their own complaints, they're pretty much content. (Literally: 'quite hairy, cat, dusty')

It's not an experiment, but try saying, 'OK. Well then, listen to my story.' If they immediately get 'irritated' (and they will, that type always does), then they are exactly 'that kind of person.'

Because I'm foolish, I thought solving problems would be good? Was that meddling? No, no, **To be honest, I had a 'desire' to be thanked by people.** Back then, I guess I didn't know the risk of entrusting myself to others like that... (bitter smile)   
  
(There's also the opposite pattern. There are those who approach you saying, 'You have problems, don't you? But don't worry!' Then you might think, 'Oh, do I have problems? Let me hear about them, maybe I should pay.' There are so many marketing schemes like this in the world. I'll write about this topic separately.)   
  
You can't change people. People who complain have a mistaken equation that 'venting to others will make you feel better,' and for some reason, they can't stop. That's the world of SM. If you don't solve the fundamental problem, you won't feel better, right? So, is it better to remain unsatisfied? ... I can only think that they want to place themselves in that kind of SM cycle. (Everyone wants to avoid getting caught up in someone else's SM, right?)   
  
Of course, if a friend is in trouble, I'll ask if they want me to seriously help them solve it, but that's because 'let's try to solve it and take action' is written in 'Article 1 of the Main Contract' of that relationship, so we discuss it...   
  
So, other than that... I won't do it anymore. I don't have time. If possible, I want to think about various things and there are many things I want to do.

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