# Cadi 7 Rialzati 8・七転八起 2 **Source:** https://taksanart.com/en/cadi-7-rialzati-8・七転八起-2 **Language:** English --- My first hospitalization. Emergency admission. It happened the day before Golden Week was about to begin... Some kind of bacteria invaded my neck, lymph nodes, tonsils, and sinuses, and rapidly became infected. I couldn't eat or drink. Excruciating pain. An accident-like experience. The doctor, a damn old man, arrogantly said terrible things. My family also became anxious. "The peak is 24-48 hours. There is a possibility of death. If you suffocate, we will insert a tube or cut your neck. We might cut it open to drain the pus. It will be excruciating pain as we cut the infected part. If your condition worsens at home during Golden Week, you might be shuttled around hospitals by ambulance. Please be hospitalized from the 1st to the 6th. Due to COVID, family visits are prohibited." (I thought, 'What kind of bastard is this?' but I didn't have the energy to argue.) My teary-eyed daughter's reaction hit me hard. If I were hospitalized, I wouldn't be able to see her for a while. I usually take good care of my health, but accidents are unpredictable. I can only trust my immune system. I had a close call for the first time in a while. There's always a possibility of passing away peacefully in my sleep at night. When you get sick, you strongly feel like "I want to live like I'm going to die" (a contradiction). I can't just die, not in this damn hospital. I've been exercising and keeping healthy. Damn it, there's so much I want to do! I thought. I couldn't sleep due to the excruciating pain. The IV drip started to work. I'll get through this. I thought. The next day, I requested to go home. Even if I were to die, I wanted to die in my own bed. Golden Week was drawing to a close, and my condition had improved. And then I realized something. I feel a change within myself. There are many things I want to do, but I'll stop expecting. There are many things I want to do, but I can't necessarily do them all. It's okay if I do them, and it's okay if I don't. That's fine. Various thoughts must have crossed my mind while in bed (I don't remember anymore). As a result, I naturally accepted a new way of thinking. Is it like 'Fall down seven times, get up eight,' or 'No pain, gain,' I don't know... I confronted myself, and various cells died and were replaced... that's the feeling. This is fine. I had fully recovered. I can eat and drink now. Alright, let's have some delicious food! PS. My selected artwork is on display at the Tokyo Metropolitan Art Museum (Ueno), B3 floor exhibition space, until May 18th. If you have time! ![Img 4394 1](https://taksanart.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/05/img_4394-1.jpg?w=595 "Cadi 7, rialzati 8・七転八起") ![Img 4410 1](https://taksanart.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/05/img_4410-1.jpg?w=1024 "Cadi 7, rialzati 8・七転八起") ### Share this: - Share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook - Share on X (Opens in new window) X - Share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window) WhatsApp ### Like this: Like Loading… ### Leave a Comment Cancel Reply